Are you ready to roll on the mats with laughter? If you’re a jiu jitsu enthusiast who loves a good pun, then you’ve come to the right place! We’ve compiled over 200 of the best jiu jitsu puns that will have you tapping out from laughter. From funny wordplay to clever twists on martial arts terminology, these puns are sure to make your training partners grin from ear to ear. Get ready to choke on your giggles as we dive into this hilarious collection of jiu jitsu puns. Whether you’re looking for a quick chuckle or a hilarious one-liner to share with your fellow grapplers, we’ve got you covered. So, make yourself comfortable on the mat and get ready to roll in laughter with these jiu jitsu puns!
Tap into these jiu jitsu puns for a laugh (Editors Pick)
1. I’m not just rolling with the punches, I’m submitting them too!
2. Jiu jitsu gives me a real grappling hook on life.
3. I may not be a black belt, but I’m definitely a master in jiu jesting.
4. My jiu jitsu skills leave opponents grappling for air!
5. When in doubt, jiu jitsu your way out!
6. I’m hooked on jiu jitsu, it’s like a chokehold that never lets go.
7. Jiu jitsu is my favorite kind of “ground and pound.”
8. I’m all about that jiu jitters life.
9. I don’t go for arm bars, I go for arm snacks!
10. Life is a roll, and jiu jitsu is my favorite technique.
11. Jiu jitsu: the art of folding people like origami.
12. Jiu jitsu isn’t just a sport, it’s a lifestyle: choke on that!
13. My jiu jitsu skills are so smooth, they’re like butter in a triangle choke.
14. Want to know my secret to success? It’s “jiu juste” practice!
15. Prepare to tap out, because I’m a grappling wizard!
16. Jiu jitsu is like dancing, but with a lot more submissions and chokes.
17. I’m the jiu jitsu master, ready to unleash my “submissionista” skills.
18. Jiu jitsu: it’s my happy place, where I can put my opponents in an unhappy place.
19. I don’t need a map to find my way in jiu jitsu, I just follow the “grapple-compass.
20. Jiu jitsu is the key to unlocking my inner warrior—plus, it’s an excellent workout!
Jiu Jitsu Wisecracks (One-liner Puns)
1. Why did the jiu jitsu student become a landscaper? Because he wanted to perfect his ground game.
2. Did you hear about the jiu jitsu match that ended quickly? It was a submission at first sight.
3. How does a jiu jitsu practitioner catch their opponent’s attention? With a kimura-ble entrance.
4. Why did the ghost start practicing jiu jitsu? It wanted to master the art of phantasm-chokes.
5. What’s a jiu jitsu artist’s favorite holiday? Triangle-giving.
6. Did you hear about the jiu jitsu club that opened at the bakery? It’s called the roll-ing pins.
7. How do jiu jitsu practitioners communicate with each other? They use joint statements.
8. What did the jiu jitsu student say before leaving the dojo? “OSS-ee you later!”
9. Why was the jiu jitsu match like a poker game? It was all about using the right moves to tap out your opponents.
10. How do jiu jitsu fighters introduce themselves at parties? “Hi, I’m Bob, but you can call me Rear Naked Choke.”
11. What’s a jiu jitsu artist’s favorite type of art? Martial arts!
12. Why are jiu jitsu lessons like a hot cup of tea? They both involve steeping.
13. How do jiu jitsu fighters make a great entrance at a party? With a flying armbar-cue.
14. Did you hear about the jiu jitsu practitioner who became a magician? He could make his opponents vanish with a sweep of his hand.
15. Why did the jiu jitsu student join the baking class? He wanted to learn the art of rolling doh.
16. How do jiu jitsu wrestlers clean their clothes? With a grappling laundry choke.
17. What’s a jiu jitsu artist’s favorite subject in school? Jiu-trition.
18. Why don’t jiu jitsu fighters ever get cold? Because they’re always rolling.
19. How does a jiu jitsu artist catch a fish? With an armbar-ler.
20. What do you call a jiu jitsu tournament that takes place underwater? A sub-ocean competition.
Jiu Jitsu Japes (Question-and-Answer Puns)
1. Why did the jiu jitsu master become a chef? Because he wanted to show off his gnarly chops!
2. What’s a jiu jitsu enthusiast’s favorite type of snack? Submission sandwiches!
3. Why do jiu jitsu fighters make great comedians? Because they always know how to deliver a punchline!
4. What do you call a jiu jitsu match in outer space? A flying armbar galaxy!
5. Why did the jiu jitsu practitioner open a bakery? Because he wanted to knead the dough!
6. What’s the jiu jitsu practitioner’s favorite type of dancer? A tap-out dancer!
7. What do you call a group of jiu jitsu fighters who love to sing? A choke-oir!
8. Why do jiu jitsu fighters love playing cards? Because they always have a tight guard!
9. What’s a jiu jitsu practitioner’s favorite type of music? Submission rap!
10. Why did the jiu jitsu fighter become a pilot? Because he wanted to master the aerial submissions!
11. What’s a jiu jitsu fighter’s favorite type of drink? Armbar-ley tea!
12. Why did the jiu jitsu practitioner become a doctor? Because he wanted to heal all those joint locks!
13. What’s a jiu jitsu fighter’s favorite type of pizza? Triangle!
14. Why do jiu jitsu fighters make terrible dentists? Because they’re always looking for submissions!
15. What’s a jiu jitsu practitioner’s favorite dessert? Acai choke!
16. Why do jiu jitsu fighters always carry an umbrella? So they don’t get caught in an armbarain!
17. What’s a jiu jitsu fighter’s favorite type of dessert? A rear-naked truffle!
18. What do you call a jiu jitsu match between two grandmas? A grapple-s!
19. Why did the jiu jitsu fighter become an artist? Because he wanted to master the art of submission!
20. What’s a jiu jitsu practitioner’s favorite type of bird? A rear-naked crane!
Choke on These Jiu Jitsu Puns (Double Entendre Puns)
1. I’m jiu jitsu-ing your heart with my moves.
2. Getting a grip on life and my opponent, one arm bar at a time.
3. He couldn’t handle my ground game, it really swept him off his feet.
4. I’m like a pretzel, flexible and irresistible.
5. Locking in a submission is like giving a big bear hug, just a little tighter.
6. “My grappling skills are so good, it’s like I have a sixth sense.”
7. “People say I have a way with chokes, but it’s all in good fun.”
8. Jiu jitsu is a game of chess on the mat, and I’m the queen.
9. When I armlock someone, they feel the power of my pinch.
10. “My opponents say my jiu jitsu is smokin’, and they’re not wrong.”
11. “I have a reputation for taking people down, but it’s only on the mat.”
12. When I roll on the mat, it’s like a dance of dominance.
13. “Some people try to escape my submissions, but they’re just grappling with fate.”
14. “My triangle choke is so tight, it’s like getting caught in a love triangle.”
15. My jiu jitsu game is like a magic trick, making opponents disappear.
16. They say the way to a man’s heart is through his stomach, but for me, it’s through an armbar.
17. “I may look innocent, but my jiu jitsu is devilishly effective.”
18. There’s nothing sweeter than a perfectly executed sweep, except maybe chocolate.
19. “I gave my opponent a taste of my jiu jitsu and left them begging for more.”
20. My jiu jitsu skills are like a magnet, attracting admiration and victory.
Jiu Jitsu Jokes: Submitting to Sublime Subheadings
1. He was down for the count in jiu jitsu, but he got back on the mat.
2. After getting defeated, he learned to roll with the punches in jiu jitsu.
3. She had a hard time grappling with her opponent in jiu jitsu, but she eventually got the upper hand.
4. He tried to sweep his opponent off their feet in jiu jitsu, but they held their ground.
5. She didn’t throw in the towel in jiu jitsu, even when faced with a tough opponent.
6. He needed to get a grip on his opponent in jiu jitsu, so he tightened his technique.
7. She went the distance in jiu jitsu, proving that she was not one to back down.
8. He practiced his arm bar in jiu jitsu until he could execute it with an iron fist.
9. She choked under pressure in jiu jitsu, but then she found her way to victory.
10. He was eager to grapple with his opponent in jiu jitsu, as it was his bread and butter.
11. She mastered the art of deceptivity in jiu jitsu, making her moves seem like a piece of cake.
12. He was a submission specialist in jiu jitsu, always aiming for the tap out.
13. She showed no mercy on the mat in jiu jitsu, proving that she was as tough as nails.
14. He felt on top of the world after submitting his opponent in jiu jitsu, like he owned the place.
15. She was a force to be reckoned with in jiu jitsu, always leaving her opponents in the dust.
16. He was in the zone during his jiu jitsu training, feeling like he was on cloud nine.
17. She never let her opponents get the upper hand in jiu jitsu, always staying one step ahead.
18. He aimed to sweep his opponents off their feet in jiu jitsu, just like a breeze in the wind.
19. She aimed to bring her A-game to the mat in jiu jitsu, leaving her opponents in awe.
20. He was ready to throw down in jiu jitsu, like a bull in a china shop.
Scrolls and Rolls: Jiu Jitsu Puns Unlocked (Pun Juxtaposition)
1. My jiu jitsu instructor always says, “Don’t choke under pressure, unless you’re doing a rear naked choke!”
2. If jiu jitsu had a cooking show, it would be called “Throwing Punches: The Art of Baking and Breaking Bones.
3. My jiu jitsu partner went on a diet, but he still has a lot of trouble with portion control when it comes to arm bars.
4. I decided to join a jiu jitsu class after realizing I needed more “ground and pound” in my life.
5. The jiu jitsu match was so intense, they called it a “submission wrestling match… with onions!
6. Whenever my jiu jitsu instructor asks how hard we should train, I always shout, “Full pun-ch!
7. The jiu jitsu class had a lot of beef, but most of it just ended up as ground chuck.
8. My favorite jiu jitsu grip is the “Knee Wrap Tortilla Lock.
9. I asked my jiu jitsu teacher if I should strangle my pasta, and he said, “Only if it’s fettuccine choke.
10. I’m on a strict diet, but I still make room for some hefty body triangle slices.
11. I told my jiu jitsu instructor I was having trouble balancing work and training, and he said, “Just remember to roll with the punches!
12. My favorite jiu jitsu training routine is called “Armbars and Armagnac.”
13. When my jiu jitsu instructor gets angry, he always serves us a special dish called Açai-yai-yai.
14. My jiu jitsu partner told me he wanted to take down his opponents with a flying kimura, but I said, “That’s a bit over the top-uh!”
15. I bought a new gi, and now I have a “wardrobe choke.”
16. My jiu jitsu instructor mixes training with sustainable practices, she calls it “Eco-subjitsu.”
17. I tried to show my jiu jitsu moves to the magician, but he said, “No thanks, I already know some disappearing arm bars!”
18. My jiu jitsu partner is a barber, she always says, “Let me give you a chop to that arm.
19. I tried to make jiu jitsu jokes, but they always fell “flat on their back.”
20. My jiu jitsu instructor’s favorite band is The Rear Naked Chokes.
“Jiu Jitsu Jest: Laughing Through The Match with Punny Names”
1. The Choke’s on You Jiu Jitsu
2. Lock, Stock, and Two Smokin’ Jiu Jitsu
3. Jiu Jitsu and the Beast
4. Jiu Jitsu-nami
5. Bruce Lee Jiu Jitsu
6. Victor “Grapple” Frankenstein Jiu Jitsu
7. Bill “The Guillotine” Jiu Jitsu
8. Ground and Pound Jiu Jitsu
9. Jiu Jitsu McFly
10. The Karate Jiu Jitsu Kid
11. Jiu Jitsu Royale
12. Float Like a Jiu Jitsu, Sting Like a Bee
13. Master Splinter’s Jiu Jitsu Dojo
14. The Grappling Wizard Jiu Jitsu
15. The Jiu Jitsu Avenger
16. Reservoir Holds Jiu Jitsu
17. Black Belt Widow Jiu Jitsu
18. Enter the Chokehold Jiu Jitsu
19. Rear Naked Jiu Jitsu
20. Karate Chops and Jiu Jitsu Locks
Jiu Jitsu Word Flips
1. “Tap a Pacifist” instead of “Pat a Tapsist”
2. Mat Rex” instead of “Rat Mex
3. “Guard Ounce” instead of “Yard Gunce”
4. “Rules Niping” instead of “Nules Riping”
5. “Takedown Chuck” instead of “Chuck Dakedown”
6. “Gi Thomping” instead of “Thi Gomping”
7. “Armbar Tim” instead of “Tarmbar Im”
8. “Jiu Gitsu” instead of “Giu Jitsu”
9. “Choke Tarter” instead of “Toke Charter”
10. Sweat a Torm” instead of “Tweat a Sorm
11. “Triangle Assembler” instead of “Anglerine Tsimbler”
12. Olympic Judo” instead of “Jymnastic Oudo
13. Heel Tooks” instead of “Teel Hooks
14. Side Shountain Elour” instead of “East Shore Shmountain Tower
15. “Kettle Gard
Judo You Love These Tom Swifties? (Jiu Jitsu Puns)
1. “I’ve got the upper hand,” Tom said, judoistically.
2. I need to stretch before the next match,” Tom said, limberly.
3. “This move is unbeatable,” Tom said, confidently.
4. “I’m giving it my all,” Tom said, fiercely.
5. “I’ll never back down,” Tom said, resolutely.
6. “I’ll finish this quickly,” Tom said, swiftly.
7. I found the perfect balance,” Tom said, gracefully.
8. “This technique is flawless,” Tom said, flawlessly.
9. “I need to stay focused,” Tom said, attentively.
10. “I’m not afraid to take risks,” Tom said, fearlessly.
11. “I’m getting better every day,” Tom said, progressively.
12. “I’ve learned to adapt quickly,” Tom said, adaptively.
13. “I’ll outmaneuver my opponent,” Tom said, maneuveringly.
14. “I’ll strike when they least expect it,” Tom said, sneakily.
15. “I’m mastering the art of submission,” Tom said, submissively.
16. “I’ll go for the decisive move,” Tom said, decisively.
17. “I need to train harder,” Tom said, determinedly.
18. “I won’t let anything hold me back,” Tom said, confidently.
19. “I have the technique down to a tee,” Tom said, technically.
20. “I’ll leave my opponents stunned,” Tom said, stunningly.
Twisted Chokehold Comedy (Jiu Jitsu Oxymoronic Puns)
1. Jiu jitsu: The gentle art of making others tap out.
2. My favorite jiu jitsu move is the stationary scramble.
3. When it comes to submissions, I’m an expert at the delicate tap dance.
4. I always find it amusing when jiu jitsu fighters practice their controlled chaos.
5. My jiu jitsu instructor says I have a beautiful aggressive flow.
6. I’m a master at the art of silently loud rolls.
7. In jiu jitsu, the best way to counter is by being defenseively offensive.
8. My jiu jitsu takedowns can be quite softly forceful.
9. When I spar, I like to be simultaneously aware and oblivious.
10. My favorite jiu jitsu position is the inverted standing guard.
11. I excel at the art of relaxed intensity in jiu jitsu.
12. Sometimes in jiu jitsu, you have to be aggressive while remaining passive.
13. My jiu jitsu submissions are a combination of controlled chaos and tranquil violence.
14. The secret to my jiu jitsu success is embracing the paradoxical simplicity of complexity.
15. I’m known for my unpredictably predictable jiu jitsu techniques.
16. My jiu jitsu game is a strategic battle of calm aggressiveness.
17. Jiu jitsu is a gentle force that can overwhelm opponents.
18. To succeed in jiu jitsu, you have to find balance within a constant state of imbalance.
19. The key to great jiu jitsu technique is finding strength in weakness.
20. I like to approach jiu jitsu with a harmonious aggression that is paradoxically peaceful.
Rolling with Laughter (Recursive Jiu Jitsu Puns)
1. Why did the jiu jitsu instructor go to therapy? He needed help finding his inner chi-chis.
2. Did you hear about the jiu jitsu champion who opened a bakery? He’s known for his rolling pins.
3. How does a jiu jitsu practitioner deal with a tough situation? They think outside the dojo.
4. What do you call a jiu jitsu fighter who can’t make up his mind? A wishy-washido.
5. Why did the jiu jitsu student always carry a pencil? In case they needed to draw a choke-hold.
6. Did you hear about the jiu jitsu master who opened a pet store? He’s a black belt in cat-two.
7. How does a jiu jitsu practitioner come up with new moves? They brainstorm in their gi-zen.
8. What did the jiu jitsu instructor say to the student who kept making the same mistake? “You need to fix your rep-eat-itions.”
9. Why did the jiu jitsu fighter become a musician? Because they wanted to master the art of jiu jazzu.
10. How do you make a jiu jitsu practitioner laugh? You tickle their funny bone-breaker.
11. What’s a jiu jitsu fighter’s favorite type of pasta? Arm-a-delli.
12. Why did the jiu jitsu athlete get a job at the post office? He’s always delivering submissions.
13. What’s a jiu jitsu idol’s favorite snack? Arm-jelly beans.
14. How did the jiu jitsu instructor handle tough students? He gave them a gentle rear-end-mind-er.
15. What’s a jiu jitsu practitioner’s favorite hot beverage? Submi-tea.
16. Why did the jiu jitsu student switch to studying marine biology? They wanted to learn how to grapple with octo-pusses.
17. How does a jiu jitsu athlete calm their nerves before a fight? They practice their zen-choke.
18. What’s the jiu jitsu fighter’s favorite romantic movie genre? Arm-submissiontale.
19. Why did the jiu jitsu practitioner become a chef? They wanted to master the art of rolling sushi-ssions.
20. How did the jiu jitsu fighter improve their memory? They practiced a lot of br’ain-jitsu.
Jiu Jitsu Puns and Submission Stances: Getting a Grip on Clichés!
1. “Rolling with the punches? More like rolling with the jiu jitsu moves!”
2. “When it comes to submissions, I’m a real arm-charmer!”
3. “Don’t be a triangle, be a submission master at jiu jitsu!”
4. “You know what they say, a chokehold a day keeps the doctor away!”
5. “I’m never in a rear naked choke, only in a rear bear hug!”
6. Jiu jitsu makes me feel like I’m floating on an omoplata!
7. “In jiu jitsu, it’s all about getting a grip – and not just on life!”
8. If you can’t stand the heat, tap out of the jiu jitsu kitchen!
9. My jiu jitsu style is like a riddle – it’s a grappling enigma!
10. “When it comes to jiu jitsu, I always roll with the flow!”
11. “I may be small, but my jiu jitsu sweeps opponents off their feet!”
12. “In jiu jitsu, I’m a submission artist – my masterpiece is the armbar!”
13. “Forget about catching flies, I’m all about catching ankles in jiu jitsu!”
14. “They say life is a journey, well, jiu jitsu is my path to victory!”
15. “In jiu jitsu, I always have my guard up – on and off the mat!”
16. They say laughter is the best medicine, but a successful sweep feels like a cure!
17. “Jiu jitsu is all about finding balance – both on and off the mats!”
18. “In jiu jitsu, I take risks – but armlocks are my favorite high stakes game!”
19. “I’m not just fighting, I’m ‘gi’-ing it my all in jiu jitsu!”
20. “Jiu jitsu may be full of twists and turns, but I’m always ready for the next ‘take-down’!”
In the world of Jiu Jitsu, a good laugh is always welcome. We hope this collection of 200+ puns has brought a smile to your face and added some humor to your martial arts journey. If you’re hungry for more puns, be sure to check out our website where you’ll find a treasure trove of wordplay and wit. Thank you for visiting and may your days be filled with laughter on and off the mat!
