Welcome to our enchanting collection of witch puns that will make you cackle with delight! Here, we’ve gathered over 200 magical puns that are sure to cast a spell on you. Whether you’re a witchcraft enthusiast, a Halloween fan or just love a good play on words, these puns are perfect for all occasions. From witty one-liners to clever wordplay, this collection has it all. So whether you’re a good witch or a bad witch, get your cauldron ready and dive into our bewitching collection of puns that are sure to leave you spellbound. Let the cackling begin!
“Spellbindingly Hilarious Witch Puns” (Editors Pick)
1. “Why did the witch go on a diet? She wanted to keep broomstick figure.”
2. “Why are witches good at gardening? They have green thumbs.”
3. “What do you call a witch’s garage? A broom closet.”
4. Why did the witch refuse to argue with the devil? She didn’t want to go to hells.”
5. “What do you call two witches living together? Broom-mates.”
6. “Why did the witch leave her broomstick at home? She wanted to take the plane for a change.”
7. “What do you call a witch who plays hockey? A penalty witch.”
8. What do you call a witch’s pet bird? A hootenanny.”
9. “Why did the witch join the air force? She wanted to be a broom pilot.”
10. “What do witches use to keep their hair in place? Scare spray.”
11. “Why did the witch put her car in reverse? She wanted to go back to her cauldron ways.”
12. “What do you call a sick witch? A spell-check.”
13. Why did the witch go to the doctor? She had a spell of dizziness.”
14. “How do you know if a witch is lying to you? Her nose will grow, just like Pinocchio’s.”
15. “What do you call a witch’s football team? The Broomstick Ballers.”
16. “Why did the witch go to the beach? She wanted to solve the sand-witch mystery.”
17. “What do you get when a witch falls into a river? A wet-spell.”
18. “Why did the witch go to the bar alone? She was looking for a potion to be alone.”
19. “What did the witch say to the photographer before the shoot? I hope you can conjure my good side.’
20. “What do you call it when a witch decides to retire? A hexit strategy.”
Wickedly Funny Witchy Wordplay (One-Liner Puns)
1. Why don’t witches wear team jerseys? Because they get broomsticks.
2. Why did the witch bring a ladder to her séance? She wanted to raise the roof.
3. What do you call a witch who lives at the beach? A sand-witch.
4. Why did the witch refuse to use the internet? She didn’t want to be hexed by a spam filter.
5. What font do witches use for their spells? Times New Roman.
6. How do you make a witch scratch? Take away her broomstick.
7. Why did the witch go on a diet? She wanted to keep her hex appeal.
8. What did the witch say when her broomstick broke? “I guess it’s time to sweep it under the rug.”
9. Why did the witch refuse to cook with ghosts? They always gave her the willies.
10. Why don’t witches like basketball? There’s too much hex-ing and dribbling.
11. What do you call a witch who practices yoga? A spell-flexer.
12. Why did the witch join a softball team? She heard they needed a good bat.
13. Why don’t witches wear flat shoes? They prefer to heel their victims.
14. What do you call a witch who owns a car dealership? A broom-seller.
15. Why don’t witches wear tight clothes? They prefer to be comfortably cloaked.
16. What do you call a witch who runs a bakery? A pie-thoven.
17. What did the witch say when she was asked to cackle? “I’ll give it a whisk.”
18. Why did the witch refuse to go on a rollercoaster? She didn’t want to ride her broom into the ground.
19. What do you call a witch who loves solving puzzles? A magi-cian.
20. Why was the witch always cold? She was constantly casting spells.
Wickedly Witchy Q&A’s (Punny Puns Galore)
1. Why did the witch go to the psychiatrist? To cure her broomstick disorder!
2. What do you get when you cross a witch and a computer? Hexadecimal!
3. Why did the witch refuse to wear a helmet when playing sports? Because she didn’t want to get broom stick head!
4. How many witches does it take to change a light bulb? It depends on the wattage.
5. Why do witches use brooms to fly? Because vacuum cleaners are too heavy!
6. What do you call a witch who lives at the beach? A sand-witch!
7. What do witches use to keep their hair in place? Scare spray!
8. What do you call a witch that’s a bad artist? A hex-tremly creative painter!
9. Why don’t witches ride the bus? Because they’re afraid of broomphobia!
10. What do you say to a witch on a broomstick? Sign the statement before taking off!
11. Why did the witch stop cooking? Because she kept turning everything into stew!
12. What do you call a witch’s cooking pot? A hex pot!
13. Why don’t witches wear tight hats? Because they can’t keep a broom on their head!
14. How do witches stay fit? They run from the broom-ist!
15. Why were the witch’s broomsticks always falling apart? She never swept them well enough!
16. What did the baby witch say to the mama witch? I love brew!
17. What is a witch’s favorite time of day? Hex o’clock!
18. Why do witches wear pointy hats? To keep their heads and spells in one place!
19. What do you call a witch’s favorite TV show? Charmed and Dangerous!
20. Why did the witch’s pet cat stop playing with her? Because the spells were getting too hairy!
Cauldron Up Some Laughs: Witchy Double Entendre Puns
1. Why did the witch join Tinder? She wanted to sweep right.
2. Why did the witch refuse to wear underwear? She wanted to go commando.
3. What did the witch say to her lover when they were getting busy? “I’m going to put a spell on you.”
4. Why did the witch’s broomstick have a mind of its own? It was rebellious and wanted to ride solo.
5. How do you get a witch to like you? Be sure to cast a love spell.
6. Why did the witch turn into a frog? She wanted to hop on a new ride.
7. What do you call a witch who’s really good in bed? A spellbinder.
8. Why did the witch visit the psychiatrist? She had a broomstick stuck in her.
9. Why did the witch get kicked out of the coven? She was too hexy.
10. Why did the witch go to the casino? She wanted to play “witching hour” slots.
11. What do you call a witch who owns a marijuana dispensary? A pot-caster.
12. Why did the witch get a boob job? She wanted double trouble.
13. What did one witch say to the other about their cauldrons? “Mine’s bigger than yours.”
14. Why did the witch’s coven have a mix-up with their sex toys? They accidentally cast a dildo spell.
15. What did the witch say about her Hocus Pocus DVD? “I can watch it a million times and it still gives me a witch-boner.”
16. What do you call a witch who bakes muffins instead of casting spells? A kitchen witch.
17. Why did the witch switch to a vegan diet? For the love of broom-kale.
18. Why did the witch get into the stock market? She heard it was a good way to put a hex on someone’s wealth.
19. What did the MPAA rating for the witch movie say? “Rated R for cauldron-words and broomstick scenes.”
20. Why did the witch break up with her boyfriend? He couldn’t handle her ride-or-die broomstick lifestyle.
Witchy Wordplay (Puns in Idioms)
1. Why did the witch get kicked off the soccer team? She always kept hexing the ball.
2. What do witches use to keep their hair up? Broomsticks.
3. Why don’t witches like to ride their brooms in the rain? They are afraid of a bad hair hex day.
4. What do you call a witch’s garage? A broom closet.
5. Why did the witch go on a diet? She wanted to keep her cauldron weight.
6. Why did the witch refuse to wear a hat? She was afraid it would cast a spell on her hair-do.
7. What do you get when you cross a witch and a snowman? Frostbite.
8. Why did the witch take up gardening? She needed to grow her own witches’ brew ingredients.
9. What do you call a witch with a rash? An itchy witchy.
10. Why do witches always wear red lipstick? Because it’s their hex appeal.
11. What do you call a witch who lives by the beach? A Sand-witch.
12. Why don’t witches go to the beach? Because they’re afraid of being sand-witched.
13. Why don’t witches like to sing at the beach? They’re afraid they may cast a sand spell.
14. What do you call a witch’s cell phone? A spell phone.
15. Why did the witch’s car break down? Because she was flying it too low.
16. What do you call a witch who loves to cook? A kitchen witch.
17. Why don’t witches use Facebook? They prefer to cast spells, not scroll.
18. Why did the witch visit the therapist? She was feeling broom-stick.
19. What did the witch use to brush her teeth? A broom brush.
20. Why did the witch stop using her cauldron? She burnt her brew-tiful hands.
Witch Please! (Pun Juxtaposition)
1. Why did the witch visit the doctor? She had a spell.
2. How do you make a witch stew? Just keep adding BOOs until you get it just fright!
3. Did you hear about the witch who won the lottery? She flew away on her broomstick to collect her winnings.
4. Why did the witch join the softball team? Because she had a great pitch.
5. What does a witch use to keep her hair in place? Scare spray.
6. Why did the witch send her cat to school? To learn purr-manent spells.
7. What’s a witch’s favorite subject in school? Spelling.
8. Why did the witch refuse to swim at the beach? She’s afraid she might get a hex-sposure to the sun.
9. What often gives a witch heartburn? A cauldron of spicy brew.
10. What did the witch say to the scarecrow? “You remind me of my ex, he was outstanding in his field.”
11. Why don’t witches wear hats when they fly? Because they prefer to raven their hair blown in the wind.
12. Which kind of music do witches like most? Magic melodies.
13. What do you call it when a witch goes on a plane? A broomstick flight.
14. What is the witch’s favorite social media platform? Spell-ogram.
15. What did one witch say to the other after a ride on a broomstick? “Wow, that was a flying experience.”
16. How does a witch keep her hair in place? Scare spray.
17. What does a witch use to keep her skin smooth? Beauty potions.
18. How many witches does it take to change a lightbulb? None. They prefer the dark.
19. Why did the witch delete her social media account? She was hexed by a troll.
20. Did you hear about the witch who got addicted to acupuncture? She was hooked the first time she tried it.
Witchy Wordplay (Puns on Witches)
1. The Witching Hourglass (a sand timer for spells)
2. Hocus Pocus Potions (a bar with witch-inspired cocktails)
3. The Wicked Witchery (a store for all your witchcraft needs)
4. Spellbinding Salon (a hair salon with a witchy twist)
5. Brew-tiful Coven (a coffee shop for witches)
6. Witchful Thinking (a blog about witchcraft)
7. Enchanted Elixirs (a bar with magical drinks)
8. Witch-better-have-my-money (a financial advisor for witches)
9. Broomstick Bistro (a restaurant with a witchy theme)
10. Black Cat Books (a bookstore specializing in witchcraft)
11. The Witch’s Cauldron (a cooking store for potions and spells)
12. Mystic Meditations (a yoga studio with a witchy twist)
13. Witch, Please! (a feminist witch blog)
14. Coven Cleaners (a cleaning service for witches)
15. Witch and Famous (a celebrity gossip site for witches)
16. The Witch’s Wardrobe (a clothing store for witchy fashion)
17. The Haunted House of Hocus Pocus (a Halloween attraction)
18. The Witch’s Familiar (a pet store for magical creatures)
19. Witchy Business (a consulting firm for witch entrepreneurs)
20. Witchful Whispers (a ASMR channel with a witchy theme)
Witchy Wordplay: Spelling Spells (Spoonerisms)
1. Switch Bitchoo
2. Bitchy Witch
3. Itch Wit
4. Whitch Bay
5. Witchoo b*tch
6. Twitchy H*wkeye
7. Wacky Hitch
8. Vicious Whitch
9. Wicked B*tch
10. Hitchy Wit
11. Lousy Witchoo
12. There’s a snitch in that witch
13. Witchful thinking
14. Bitch, please!
15. Twitchy Witch
16. Whitchamacallit
17. That’s a bitchin’ witch
18. Bitchin’ Whitch
19. Not your average witch
20. A rich witch
Which Witch Puns (Tom Swifties)
1. “I can brew up something special,” the witch said magically.
2. “I’m sorry, but I can’t hex you anymore,” the witch said ruefully.
3. “I’ll be back before you can say ‘hocus-pocus’,” the witch said expressively.
4. “I don’t like talking about my craft,” the witch said wickedly.
5. “Some say I’m too catty,” the witch said purrfectly.
6. “I might seem heartless, but I love what I do,” the witch said charmingly.
7. “I’m always up to something,” the witch said spookily.
8. “I’m not joking, this is serious black magic,” the witch said darkly.
9. “I’m feeling quite magical tonight,” the witch said whimsically.
10. “I can see the future, and it’s looking quite enchanting,” the witch said insightfully.
11. “I can’t bewitch you if you keep your guard up,” the witch said slyly.
12. “I learned how to be a witch from a spell-book,” the witch said intelligently.
13. “I’m in the mood for some eye of newt,” the witch said eagerly.
14. “I may be a witch, but at least I’m not a muggle,” the witch said haughtily.
15. “I can put a spell on you that will make your head spin,” the witch said dizzyingly.
16. “I’m not in the mood for visitors, I’m feeling quite coven-tional,” the witch said inhospitably.
17. I’m not just any old witch, I’m a salem wizard,” the witch said historically.
18. “I’m not afraid of any competition, I’m always hex-traordinary,” the witch said confidently.
19. I can make your heart skip a beat with just one word,” the witch said spellbindingly.
20. I’m not one to kiss and tell, but some spells require it,” the witch said enchantingly.
Magical Ironies: Oxymoronic Witch Puns
1. The witch doctor administered modern medicine.
2. The witch’s coven took a vow of silence and proceeded to gossip.
3. The witch brewed up a dry martini.
4. The witch’s kitchen was immaculately dirty.
5. The witch’s curse brought blessings galore.
6. The witch was wickedly kind.
7. The witch in high heels flew low.
8. The witch put on her invisibility cloak and stood out in the crowd.
9. The witch’s broom had a steering wheel.
10. The witch’s potions were caffeine-free.
11. The witch had a contagious smile that frightened children.
12. The witch’s spell made everything reversible.
13. The witch turned her enemies into friends.
14. The witch was a vegetarian who loved to cook frog legs.
15. The witch’s cauldron was filled with dry ice.
16. The witch’s hat acted as a satellite dish.
17. The witch put a hex on you, but it was for good luck.
18. The witch’s familiar was a dog who never barked.
19. The witch cast a spell to break the curse.
20. The witch’s magic wand was actually a pencil.
Hex-ceptional Witch Puns (Recursive Witch-ery)!
1. Why did the witch go on a diet? She wanted to keep her A-weighs Broomin’
2. Why don’t witches wear no underwear? So they can get a better grip on their brooms.
3. What do you get when you cross a witch with a snowman? Frostbite.
4. Why did the witch refuse to fight her enemies? She didn’t want to HEX-ercise.
5. How do witches keep their hair in place while flying? Scare spray.
6. Why don’t witches cook with ghosts in the kitchen? Their ingredients are BOO-oring.
7. What do you get when you cross a witch with alcohol? A scotch witch.
8. How do witches keep their hair in place while flying? Scarella.
9. Why don’t witches wear sneakers? Because they prefer booties.
10. What do you call a witch chanting in a cave? A Spellunker.
11. What do you call a witch who lives near the ocean? A sandwitch.
12. What do you get when you cross a witch with a rabbit? A bunny hopped up on black magic.
13. Why did the witch refuse to wear black? She didn’t want to dress for the FUNK-eral.
14. What does a witch do when she’s angry? She flies off the handle.
15. Why did the witch go on a date with a ghost? She was shy and needed a BOO-zy.
16. What do you get when you cross a witch with a bird? A feather-brained enchantress.
17. Why couldn’t the witch cook a meal? She lost her spell book and couldn’t find the RECIPE-lations.
18. Why did the witch buy a cloak? To go with her broomstick.
19. Why didn’t the witch go to the charity event? She didn’t want to be SPELL-bound.
20. How does a witch prepare for a first date? She gives herself a BEWITCH-ing makeover.
Casting a Spell with Witch Puns (Puns on Witch Clichés)
1. If a witch’s broom breaks, can she still fly off the handle?
2. It’s easy to witch people off with bad puns.
3. I knew a witch who loved to go to the beach, but she always forgot her cauldron.
4. Don’t be a witch, share your candy.
5. Witches don’t need Botox, they just use their magic to get rid of wrinkles.
6. How do you make a witch scratch? Take away her broom!
7. Did you hear about the witch who won the spelling bee? She was spellbinding.
8. Every time I meet a witch, I always get the same spellbinding feeling.
9. Some witches don’t tell fortunes, they prefer to spell it out.
10. What’s the witch’s favorite subject in school? Spell-ing.
11. Witches never age, they just become more spellbound.
12. What did the witch doctor say to the sick ghost? You need to exorcise more.
13. Why was the witch’s broom really bad at sport? It was always sweeping.
14. The witch told the fortune teller, “I don’t need your crystal ball, I have my own eye of newt.”
15. Why did the witch go on a diet? She wanted to keep her broomstick figure.
16. I wanted to tell a potion joke, but all of them are cackling.
17. What happens when a witch accidentally walks through a sandstorm? She becomes a sand-witch.
18. Why did the witch decide to become a baker? Because she wanted to put a spell on her cakes.
19. I met a witch who was really into health and wellness. She said she was just watching her hex-ercise.
20. Why did the witch become a librarian? She studied spell books.
In conclusion, we hope that our 200+ bewitching witch puns have cast a spell on you and left you giggling like a witch on Halloween night. If you’re hungry for more puns, feel free to check out our website for more magical collections. Thank you for taking the time to visit us, and as always, happy punning!
