Customs Puns: 220 Hilarious Handpicked Puns to Tickle Your Funny Bone

Punsteria Team
puns customs

Get ready for some pun-tastic laughs with our handpicked collection of over 200 hilarious puns related to customs! From international travel to holiday traditions, we’ve got puns to tickle your funny bone. Whether you’re a fan of wordplay or just need a good laugh, this collection of puns is sure to brighten your day. From clever puns about passports to witty jokes about customs agents, we’ve got it all. So sit back, relax, and enjoy these puns piled high with humor. Warning: you may experience uncontrollable laughter and a sudden desire to share these puns with everyone you know. Get ready to unleash the pun-ishment!

“Punny Customs that are Worth a Chuckle” (Editors Pick)

1. A customs officer will always have the final “say in who gets to stay”.
2. When I tried to bring a pun into the country, the customs officers replied, “That joke doesn’t quite mesh with our culture.”
3. The customs officer was a real comedian – he gave me a passport “to laughter”.
4. I always bring a good pun to customs …it’s my “Karma chameleon”.
5. The customs officer said I couldn’t bring in my collection of puns, but I told him, “I’ve had a ‘witty-pun permit’ for years”.
6. Beware of customs officers who tell bad jokes – they just may be “pun-ishing”.
7. I once got busted for smuggling puns, but luckily I had a “pun-gent lawyer”.
8. When I travel, my customs form lists my occupation as “pun slinger”.
9. The customs officers were surprised when I got through inspection and said, “Wow, that was a ‘no puns intended’ situation”.
10. At customs they asked me, “Do you have anything to declare?”, and I replied, “Only my love for puns”.
11. When a customs officer stopped me, I said, “Don’t you know who I am? I’m the king of ‘pun-ditry’.”
12. My customs officer was impressed by my ability to “pun-der” through difficult questions.
13. When I tried to bring my pun-filled luggage through customs, they said I had “an excess of carry-on”.
14. The customs officer asked to see my passport, and I replied “I hope you’re not ‘visa-ly’ impaired”!
15. The customs officer said my jokes were terrible, but I told him “That’s just a ‘humerus’ joke”.
16. If there were a customs category for “Punmonesia” I would get extra scrutiny.
17. When I went through customs, they told me I needed a “Pun’-der My Visa” to enter.
18. The customs officer said it wasn’t polite to make puns, but I told him “That’s not what your ‘pun-etiquette’ guide says”.
19. When the customs agent looked at my passport, he said “This joke isn’t funny, it’s more like a ‘Pun-ishment’.
20. The customs officer stopped me and asked, “What’s in your bag?” I replied, “Just some ‘punny’ business!”

Clever Customs Chuckles (One-liner Puns)

1. Customs officials are experts in their field, but sometimes they inspect-ted the wrong thing.
2. I got a job at the airport customs, but it didn’t take off.
3. I called the customs office and the phone said, “please hold.
4. Did you hear about the customs agent who got promoted? He really rose to the occasion.
5. It’s a custom in some countries to bring a gift when you visit, but in Australia you just bring a boomerang.
6. The customs officer asked me if I had a criminal record. I told him I didn’t even know that record was still popular.
7. Why do customs officers wear sunglasses? So they don’t see any baggage.
8. I don’t always go through customs, but when I do, I try not to get detained.
9. I tried to smuggle a pair of sneakers into the country, but got caught at the airport customs – talk about a sole crushing experience.
10. At customs, the officer asked me if I had anything to declare. I told him, “Yes! I’m a genius!”
11. The customs officer said I had a great smile, but I had to pay duty on it.
12. You thought wine tasting was cool? Wait until you try customs clearance.
13. I was detained by customs for trying to smuggle stinky cheese into the country. It was a cheesy thing to do.
14. Customs officers are always on the lookout for banned substances. They’re quite vigilant-tees.
15. The customs officer asked me if I had anything to declare. I said, “Yes, I’m addicted to puns.” He said, “I’m sorry sir, you’ll have to face the pun-ishment.”
16. I made a custom playlst for when I’m going through customs. It’s called “Pat-downs for What”.
17. I always tell customs that I have nothing to declare, but then use the space to deliver a motivational speech on border control.
18. I don’t trust the customs agents in space. They’re known to be aliens.
19. I tried to smuggle in a shipment of rubber ducks, but the customs agent said they were way over the duck limit.
20. I was caught trying to sneak homemade pizza through customs. I guess you could say, I really kneaded it.

Punny Practices: Q&A Fun with Customs and Puns

1. How do you organize a space-themed party? You planet.
2. Why did the scarecrow win an award? Because he was outstanding in his field.
3. What did the grape say when it got stepped on all the time? Nothing, it just let out a little whine.
4. Why shouldn’t you let Batman drive your car? Because he has bat-titude.
5. How do you make a tissue dance? Put a little boogey in it.
6. Why was the math book sad? Because it had too many problems.
7. Why do cows wear bells? Because their horns don’t work.
8. Why was the computer cold? It left its Windows open.
9. Why did the tomato turn red? Because it saw the salad dressing.
10. How does a penguin build its house? Igloos it together.
11. Why did the teddy bear say no to dessert? Because it was already stuffed.
12. Why did the can crusher quit his job? It was soda pressing.
13. How do you organize a party in space? You planet.
14. What’s the difference between a poorly-dressed man on a trampoline and a well-dressed man on a trampoline? Attire.
15. Why don’t scientists trust atoms? Because they make up everything.
16. What did the grape do when it got stepped on? It let out a little wine.
17. Why was the cookie sad? Because it was feeling crumby.
18. What do you call a fish that wears a bowtie? Sofishticated.
19. Where do you take a sick bird? To see a tweet-ment specialist.
20. What do you call a can opener that doesn’t work? A can’t opener.

“Putting on a Pun-tastic Show: Double Entendre Puns That’ll Have You Customs-ing in Laughter”

1. The custom officer was hot stuff, especially when he started talking about his stamp collection.
2. Customs agents are always searching for a little contraband in all the wrong places.
3. The airport’s customs line was a real stripper, but at least it gave me time to work on my tan.
4. When I told customs about my bag of chips, I was a little worried they’d give me the cavity search.
5. The customs officer told me he’d had a rough day because he was forced to work overtime and it was a pretty hard package.
6. My parents were a little confused when I told them I was going into customs, but they thought I’d make a great pair of handcuffs.
7. The customs guy was so friendly, I almost put out my tray table and hit on him.
8. The new customs agent came in like a lamb, but then became a real lion when he started finding stolen goods.
9. I don’t usually get off on baggage claims, but when I saw the customs guy handling my bags, it was kinda sexy.
10. It was obvious from the look on the customs officer’s face that she knew how to work a stick.
11. The customs agent asked if I had anything to declare — I told him I was a bit of a “whips and chains” guy.
12. I didn’t need a customs official to tell me that bringing a guinea pig into the country is always an exotic move.
13. The customs inspection was pretty intense, but then again I’ve always been into that sort of thing.
14. It was clear from the way the customs officer checked out my passport that she was a big fan of stamps.
15. After hours of being grilled by customs, I was starting to think that I might be in hot water.
16. The customs official sent me to the back room for a closer inspection, but I didn’t mind — I’ve always thought I looked pretty good under a microscope.
17. The customs lady looked at me like she was ready to pounce, but then again, I’ve always had a thing for women who handle things with authority.
18. Customs officials always seem to have a keen nose for finding out when something smells fishy.
19. When I saw the customs agent checking out my packages, I knew she was really into hard-core cargo.
20. The customs officer winked and asked me if I had any baggage — I told him he was looking at it.

Customary Comedy: Puns in Customs Idioms

1. The custom of tipping is usually a gratuity-ous one.
2. I may have missed the customs check, but I’ll still be boarding this plane in a customs-y fashion!
3. Don’t get in trouble with the law – it’s just not good custom.
4. We may be in a pickle if we don’t follow the correct customs process.
5. If you’re not sure what to wear, just go with the custom-ary attire.
6. Learning new customs can be quite a culture-shock.
7. If you’ve got a good custom-er service team, your business is sure to thrive.
8. That customs officer gave me a real passport-portunity to use my puns!
9. Some customs are more fun to break than others.
10. I’m not one to brag, but when it comes to customs, I’m a real expert.
11. Sometimes, following the customs of a new country can be quite a foreign concept.
12. Following good customs is a surefire way to make a great impression.
13. The customs of different cultures can really spice up our lives.
14. If you’re feeling lost, just remember to trust in the customs of those who know the way.
15. The customs agent raised an eyebrow at my puns, but eventually let me through without any baggage.
16. When it comes to travel, learning the customs of a new place can really be a passport to success.
17. Good manners are the cornerstone of customs etiquette.
18. If you’re ever in doubt, just refer back to the customs handbook!
19. Good customs are like a fine wine – they only get better with age.
20. Some customs are so deeply ingrained that we barely even notice them anymore.

Puntastic Customs: A Play on Pun Juxtapositions!

1. The customs agent asked the criminal if he had anything to declare, so he declared that he was innocent.
2. The comedian’s customs joke didn’t fly well with the TSA, but his luggage did.
3. The tourist found himself in a sticky situation when he violated local customs by chewing gum.
4. The customs official was surprised to see the hamster in the traveler’s luggage, but it was a case of hamstering customs.
5. After forgetting his passport, the tourist realized that customs check is the key to success.
6. When the traveler passed through customs, he realized he made a faux-pass.
7. The smuggler had a colorful personality, but he chose to blend in with customs.
8. The customs officer was sneezing uncontrollably when a traveler asked if he had experienced any seizures recently.
9. The travel agent recommended packing light for the customs landscape, but the tourist preferred the weight of his heavy suitcase.
10. The customs agent was skeptical of the tourist’s story about the guitar being his sole possession, but it turned out to be the string along.
11. The international restaurant was saddened by the customs restrictions preventing them from importing fresh herbs, but they continued to saffran.
12. The customs agent was stunned when he found an entire bar in the traveler’s suitcase, but it was a case of bar-tering customs.
13. The tourist had a severe allergy to peanuts, but it didn’t stop him from enjoying some customs and cultures.
14. The customs officer had a great sense of humor, so he just laughed at the traveler who accidentally smuggled a cactus back to the US.
15. The tourist forgot to fill out his customs declaration form, so he had to face the repercussion of a custom-made fine.
16. The customs agent was a huge fan of puns, so he let the writer bring in all his pun stories into the country.
17. The customs officials found a large sum of cash in the traveler’s bag, but it turns out he was just trying to embezzle the customs of his home country.
18. When asked if she had any seeds in her bag, the traveler replied: “What, like a secret customs ketchup recipe?”
19. The traveler smuggled a grapefruit through customs, but it was just a little citrus affair.
20. The customs officer was impressed when the traveler declared all his earnings honestly. He later realized it was a case of honesty is the best policy.

“Custom Punditry: Laugh Your Way Through Cultural Traditions”

1. The tailor shop called “Pin and Tonic”
2. A shoe store named “Heel Yeah
3. A cleaning service called “Dust Busters”
4. A wedding planning business named “Aisle Be Yours
5. A bakery called “Rollin’ in Dough
6. A barber shop named “Hair to the Throne
7. A BBQ restaurant called “Grill Power
8. A pet grooming salon named “Fur Real
9. A fitness center called “Sweat Equity
10. A florist shop named “Stemsations”
11. A toy store called “Play It Again”
12. A seafood restaurant named “Catch of the Day Spa
13. A wine shop called “Wine Not?”
14. A car dealership named “Shift Happens”
15. A sandwich shop called “Lettuce Eat
16. A pizza restaurant named “Slice of Life”
17. An ice cream parlor called “Brain Freeze
18. A gardening service named “Sow Much Fun”
19. A mobile phone repair shop called “Cell-A-Bration”
20. A bookstore named “Read All About It”

“Customs with a Comical Twist (Spoonerisms)”

1. Blazing grills instead of gazing bills
2. Flaming plunks instead of planning flunks
3. Sailing ships instead of shailing lips
4. Catching trains instead of scratching pains
5. Hitting bulls instead of biting holes
6. Mopping floors instead of popping mores
7. Bending ropes instead of rendering hopes
8. Laying bricks instead of braying licks
9. Peeping Tom instead of teeping pom
10. Ducking stool instead of stocking dual
11. Dreadful blight instead of bideful light
12. Butt of the joke instead of jut of the broke
13. Power of the mind instead of mire of the pound
14. Flaming blunder instead of blending thunder
15. Custody battle instead of busty cattle
16. Poison pen instead of coined pence
17. Resting watch instead of wasting rotch
18. Crying shame instead of shining creme
19. Gobbler shop instead of shoelace shop
20. Naughty bits instead of bitty knots

Customized Quips (Tom Swifties on Puns and Customs)

1. “I refuse to pay taxes,” said Tom customarily.
2. “I’m going to the airport,” Tom announced curtly.
3. “I have to declare my luggage,” said Tom, dutifully.
4. “I love visiting different countries,” Tom said worldily.
5. “I’m going to the post office,” Tom mailed it in.
6. “I always follow the rules,” said Tom literally.
7. “I never go to customs,” Tom protested suit-ably.
8. “I need to fill out a form,” Tom said formally.
9. “I really hate long lines at customs,” Tom said impatiently.
10. I’m always up for an adventure,” Tom volunteered.
11. “I don’t like crossing borders,” Tom said, crossing his arms.
12. “I appreciate the simplicity of customs,” Tom said openly.
13. “I always obey the law,” Tom said dutifully.
14. “I’m not a fan of going through customs,” Tom admitted gravely.
15. “I don’t like customs search procedures,” Tom singled out.
16. “I declare, I’m not happy with customs,” Tom said firmly.
17. “I have to pass through customs,” Tom said with a sigh.
18. “I dislike waiting in the customs line,” Tom said churlishly.
19. “I always declare my souvenirs,” Tom said candidly.
20. “I just love the customs experience,” Tom said fanatically.

Contradictory Wordplay: Oxymoronic Puns on Customs

1. Customs agents work tirelessly to prevent illegal imports and exports, yet they still receive a “goods job” from their superiors.

2. The customs officer’s favorite movie is Inception because he enjoys catching people who are smuggling illegal dream goods.

3. The customs department made a big mistake when they hired a cat as their supervisor; he was too lax and let too many things slip through his paws.

4. If the customs department were a sandwich, it would be bittersweet – they’re always on a roll, but the work is a pain in the butt-er.

5. The new customs agent got off to a rocky start when he confiscated a shipment of rubber chickens, but he quickly bounced back and became the talk of the town.

6. They say that honesty is the best policy, but when it comes to customs, sometimes lies really pay off.

7. The customs officer had a reputation for being a stickler for the rules, but he always had a soft spot for contraband baked goods.

8. Customs officials are like superheroes – they wear capes, have secret identities, and frequently save the day.

9. The customs department recently introduced meditation breaks for their employees, which is great for those who like to seize the day.

10. When it comes to smuggling illegal goods, customs officials will find you, but you really have to get out of bed and make a run for it.

11. If you’re ever stopped at customs, remember that honesty is the best pigment – you don’t want to get caught with fake tan.

12. Some customs officers are known for taking their jobs a bit too seriously, but it’s all in the line of fire.

13. When the customs department announced that all employees would be subject to random drug testing, they were surprised by the amount of resistance they encountered.

14. Customs officials are like detectives, always on the hunt for clues and analyzing evidence to make a case.

15. The customs department has a strict policy against accepting bribes, but they occasionally make exceptions for chocolate.

16. The customs officer’s favorite musical is Grease, because it’s all about smuggling illegal motor oil.

17. Some people think that customs officials are just there to ruin your day, but they’re actually pretty chill – as long as you’re not smuggling in any contraband seafood.

18. If you’re ever trying to smuggle illegal drugs past customs, just know that it’s a slippery slope – and you might end up in hot water.

19. The customs department has a special task force dedicated to catching smugglers who specialize in illegal firearms – they call them the gun-runners.

20. Some customs officials take their jobs so seriously that they’re basically bordering on obsession – but hey, whatever floats your boat.

Pun-ception: Unpack These Recursive Puns on Customs

1. The best way to tell if someone is a pun master is to look for the obvious sighs.
2. My puns are so bad, even I’m sleep-de-praved.
3. I was going to make a pun about the customs office, but it would take too long to clear.
4. Puns related to customs are allowed, but they must be declared at the border.
5. I’m not great at puns, but I’ve got one that’s a custom to my routine.
6. Pun-ing is like customizing language to fit your personal style.
7. One pun is never enough, I always like to start a pun-versation.
8. I tried to make a pun about the post office, but the jokes just kept getting stamped out.
9. You know someone’s good at puns when they keep coming back for more, and yet the puns never do.
10. Last night I dreamt that I was making puns, but when I woke up they were all gone-cerned.
11. I made a pun about online shopping, but it didn’t ship.
12. Puns are a custom-tary part of my daily routine.
13. I made a pun about a broken escalator, but it didn’t go over well.
14. You must be customs-ized to enjoy my puns.
15. I made a pun about trains, but it went off the rails.
16. My favorite type of puns are the meta customs ones.
17. I hate it when people miss my puns, it’s such a customs-stake.
18. Puns aren’t just a hobby, they’re a customs of mine.
19. I made a pun about the circus, but it was in-tents.
20. Making puns is a long-standing customs in my family.

“Punbelievable Customs: Taking Wordplay to the Next Level”

1. Customs agents always let me through because I’m a real baggage of puns.
2. Never trust someone who tells customs they have nothing to declare – they’re lying.
3. If you’re caught smuggling donuts into the country, you’ll be in a sticky jam.
4. Crossing the border with a pirated movie is a film-ly offense.
5. The immigrant said he left his old life behind, but his baggage was full of puns.
6. The smuggler was caught smuggling custom-made shoes. He had sole-ly committed a crime.
7. Joining the circus is a high-flying lifestyle, but it’s always a precarious trapeze pun.
8. Customs will check you twice if Santa comes through your window.
9. When the customs agent asked for my occupation, I told her I was a pun-ter.
10. You can tell a lot about someone by what they declare at customs, but don’t jump to consonant-lusions.
11. The TSA agent was impressed by my puns but warned me – “Puns and needles, buddy.”
12. When the customs agent asked if I had anything to declare, I answered, “just my love for puns.”
13. The smuggler hoped to make a clean getaway, but customs had their eyes peeled for any criminal celery.
14. The airport customs told me I wasn’t allowed to bring any gummy bears – but they must have had a ursine gripe with me.
15. The customs agent asked me if I had any prohibited items. I grinned and said, “Only prohibited puns, sir.”
16. The smuggler tried to sneak in illegal books across the border, but was held at bookpoint.
17. The customs agent complimented me on my puns as he stamped my passport. “That’s a seal of approval!”
18. When the customs agent saw my pun-filled baggage, he said I was quick on the pun-draw.
19. When the smuggler discovered he was being watched, he made his escape via the customed-made tunnel.
20. Trying to sneak a cat into the country is a claw-ful idea.

In conclusion, we hope these puns have kept you laughing and entertained. But don’t worry, the puns don’t stop here! Visit our website for more hilarious puns that are sure to tickle your funny bone. We appreciate you taking the time to join us on this pun-tastic journey!

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Punsteria Team

We're the wordplay enthusiasts behind the puns you love. As lovers of all things punny, we've combined our passion for humor and wordplay to bring you Punsteria. Our team is dedicated to collecting and curating puns that will leave you laughing, groaning, and eager for more.