200+ Hilarious Mailman Puns That Deliver Loads of Laughs

Punsteria Team
mailman puns

Get ready to stamp your passport to Punville, because we’ve got a special delivery of laughter just for you! Our package of over 200 mailman puns is guaranteed to address your need for a good chuckle. Whether you’re in the mood for something express-ly funny or you just want to envelope yourself in humor, we’ve got all the postage-paid giggles you can handle. So, no need to check your tracking number—these jokes are arriving right on schedule. Fasten your seatbelts, and let’s zip through the hysterical world of mailman puns that promise to deliver loads of laughs with first-class wit!

Delivering Smiles: Our Top Mailman Puns (Editors Pick)

1. Why don’t secret agents sleep? Because they never know when they might be under cover!
2. Why is dark spelled with a K and not C? Because you can’t see in the dark.
3. I told my wife she should embrace her mistakes. She gave me a hug.
4. What do you call a pile of cats? A meowtain.
5. Why don’t some couples go to the gym? Because some relationships don’t work out!
6. I’m reading a book on anti-gravity. It’s impossible to put down!
7. What did the janitor say when he jumped out of the closet? “Supplies!”
8. Why do we tell actors “break a leg”? Because every play has a cast.
9. Why don’t skeletons fight each other? They don’t have the guts.
10. Have you heard about the new restaurant called Karma? There’s no menu: You get what you deserve.
11. I’m very pleased with my new fridge magnet. So far I’ve got twelve fridges.
12. Why don’t eggs tell jokes? They’d crack each other up.
13. Did you hear about the kidnapping at school? It’s fine, he woke up.
14. How do you organize a space party? You planet.
15. Why did the tomato turn red? Because it saw the salad dressing!
16. I would avoid the sushi if I was you. It’s a little fishy.
17. What does a lemon say when it answers the phone? Yellow!
18. Have you heard about the chocolate record player? It sounds pretty sweet.
19. I’m reading a book on the history of glue. I just can’t seem to put it down.
20. What happens when you go to the beach on a hot day? You get a tan-gent.

“Special Delivery Chuckles: Mailman Pun Parade”

1. I wanted to become a mailman, but I couldn’t deliver the punchline.
2. Our local mailman really is a man of letters.
3. A mailman’s favorite band has to be The Postal Service.
4. To the nervous mailman, every delivery is a parcel of worry.
5. Did you hear about the forgetful mailman? He lost the post.
6. I told my mailman to post-pone my bills. He didn’t find it funny.
7. If a mailman got delivery offers from two countries, it would be a postal dilemma.
8. Mail carriers are great at boxing, they handle so many parcels.
9. That mailman who gained weight really let the mail go to his hips.
10. Mailman jokes? Oh, they’re first class!
11. I met a vampire mailman. He goes by Count Stampula.
12. Mailmen don’t like puns, they think they’re too envelope-pushing.
13. A mailman’s favorite dance move is the envelope push.
14. Did you hear about the mailman who became a comedian? He had a special delivery for every joke.
15. When a mailman gets sick, do they call for envelope-ment?
16. I told my mailman a joke about a stamp. He just returned it to sender.
17. Never fight a mailman – they have a license to post.
18. A mailman told me he wanted to write a book. He had a novel package of ideas.
19. Every time my mailman makes a mistake, he says it’s a parcel error.
20. How do mailmen grow their gardens? By planting stampedes.

“Special Delivery Chuckles: Mailman Q&A Puns”

1. Q: What’s a mailman’s favorite kind of bag?
A: The one that’s first-class!

2. Q: How does a mailman fix his car?
A: With parcel tape!

3. Q: Why did the mailman become a comedian?
A: Because he always delivered!

4. Q: Why are mailmen great for gardening?
A: They have the best ‘parcel’ of land!

5. Q: How does a mailman fight off a dog?
A: He uses his ‘postal’ instincts!

6. Q: Why was the mailman a great boxer?
A: He knew how to handle his ‘punch’ cards!

7. Q: What did the stamp say to the envelope?
A: “Stick with me, and we’ll go places!”

8. Q: Why was the mailman a terrible orchestra conductor?
A: He kept trying to sort the instruments!

9. Q: Why don’t mailmen get lost?
A: They’ve got ‘mail’ maps!

10. Q: What does a mailman do on a farm?
A: Delivers ‘mailk’!

11. Q: What’s a mailman’s favorite shoe brand?
A: ‘Post’-Nike!

12. Q: What’s a mailman’s favorite board game?
A: ‘Parcel’-cheesi!

13. Q: Why was the mailman so calm?
A: He knew there was no ‘package’ deal with stress!

14. Q: Why did the mailman break up with his girlfriend?
A: There was no ‘return’ address on their relationship!

15. Q: How does a mailman learn to dance?
A: They ‘stamp’ to the beat!

16. Q: What’s a mailman’s favorite football play?
A: The ‘mailbox’ pattern!

17. Q: What’s a mailman’s life motto?
A: ‘Address’ every day like it’s special delivery!

18. Q: Why did the envelope go to jail?
A: It was always pushing the envelope!

19. Q: How does a mailman stay cool?
A: Through the ‘package’ and cooling center!

20. Q: What’s a mailman’s favorite pastime?
A: ‘Letterboxing’!

Special Delivery: Sealed with a Grin (Double Entendre Mailman Puns)

1. You’ve got mail… and by the look on your face, that’s not the only package you received today!
2. Is that an overstuffed mailbox, or are you just happy to see me?
3. When you said you’d handle my package with care, I didn’t know you meant it literally!
4. Hope you’re good at sorting out your feelings, because there’s a lot of junk in there.
5. You must be a priority mail, because you’ve got my stamp of approval.
6. Are you a mailman? Because it seems like you have a special delivery for me.
7. I must be express shipping, because I arrive overnight.
8. I’ve heard that mailmen are great with their hands… especially at handling the big parcels.
9. No need for tracking, I can tell exactly where you’re going with that package.
10. You must be first-class mail, because you’ve really got my attention.
11. Is that a bulky package, or are you just overloaded with charm?
12. When I said drop it in my slot, I didn’t mean the mail.
13. Hope your delivery route isn’t the only thing that’s long and hard.
14. You must work in parcel delivery because you handle those big boxes like a pro.
15. They say the post never stops, and by the looks of it, neither do you.
16. Is that letter sealed with a kiss, or are you just spreading the love?
17. You don’t need a signature to confirm this delivery, there’s already plenty of evidence.
18. Is that an undeliverable return, or are you just excited to see me again?
19. I like my mail like I like my men:handled with care and arriving daily.
20. If you’re the mailman, does this mean you deliver twice on Saturdays?

Special Delivery: Post-Perfect Puns

1. Signed, sealed, delivered, I’m YULEs.
2. He had a first-class attitude with no room for parcel-tality.
3. Speak of the deliver and he shall appear.
4. You’ve got mail-nificent presence.
5. They say third time’s the charm, but I prefer the overnight express.
6. “Postal” my heart on your sleeve, because you always deliver love.
7. Don’t count your chickens before they hatch, unless tracking says they’re in transit.
8. Better late than never, unless we’re talking about express mail.
9. Return to sender, because you have a way of addressing my heart.
10. Neither snow nor rain nor heat will keep me from pun-dering about mail.
11. A watched pot never boils, but a watched mailbox always receives.
12. Like father, like s-ON its way in the mail.
13. You can’t teach an old dog new tricks, but you can teach a mailman new routes.
14. Keep your friends close and your mailman closer.
15. Good things come to those who mail-t.
16. Laughter is the best medicine unless it’s returned due to insufficient postage.
17. A penny for your thoughts, a stamp for your letter.
18. An envelope addressed to the hill always gets over it.
19. Stamp-ede your fears, the mailman’s here!
20. Home is where the heart is, and your package is on the porch.

“Special Delivery: Unboxing Mailman Wordplay!”

1. I used to be a mailman, but I quit because the job wasn’t first-class.
2. The mailman’s favorite exercise? Delivering the male crunches.
3. Last week my mailman disappeared. He just couldn’t express himself.
4. My dad was a mailman, but he switched careers. Now he’s pushing the envelope in marketing.
5. Why did the mailman become a comedian? Because he had a special delivery of puns.
6. The lazy mailman became a gardener because he wanted to avoid the daily grind.
7. I asked the mailman if he liked his job, he said it has its ups and downs just like his route.
8. My dog didn’t bite the mailman, just gave him a stern “letter” of reprimand.
9. I told my mailman to keep the junk mail; he’s now an accidental recycler.
10. When the mailman retired, he couldn’t leave his work behind; he was forever stamping his presence.
11. The mailman is also a DJ; he always knows how to drop the beat with the letters.
12. I threw a surprise party for my mailman. You should have seen the look on his “parcel”-white face!
13. Did you hear about the mailman who took up painting? He loves to brush and post.
14. The part-time mailman became a farmer because he was tired of addressing corny issues.
15. The fitness freak quit being a mailman because he didn’t like the junk mail weighing him down.
16. The mailman told me his job was stationary, but that couldn’t be further from the truth.
17. The tired mailman became a shoemaker because it was less about the mail and more about the “soles.”
18. My mailman hates mail theft – you could say he wants to stamp out crime.
19. The young mailman left his job to become a gardener; he said he preferred “planting” the seeds for the future.
20. Why did the mailman take up acting? Because every day he’d deliver a new “role.”

Special Delivery: Parceling Out Mailman Monikers

1. Post Malone – A mailman’s favorite singer.
2. Russell the Leaves – A mailman who works during fall.
3. Bill Deliverer – The guy who always brings your invoices.
4. Cliff Hangar – The mailman who always has a suspenseful story.
5. Carey Envelopes – Your dedicated postal worker.
6. Rita Book – The mail lady who loves literature.
7. Pat Myback – The friendly postman who congratulates you for retrieving your mail.
8. Ella Vator – For the mail carrier who works in high-rise buildings.
9. Mark Mywords – The mailman who always keeps his promises.
10. Phil Upmybox – The guy who never fails to deliver a full mailbox.
11. Paige Turner – The mailwoman who makes you look forward to each delivery.
12. Perry Shable – The postman who comes rain or shine.
13. Dustin Mailbox – The neatest mail carrier in town.
14. Drew A. Letter – The artistic mailman.
15. Skip Towne – The postal worker who’s always moving.
16. Maila Propism – The mail carrier who mixes words.
17. Stan Dupp – The most reliable mail carrier, always standing up for his customers.
18. Art Major – A mailman who specializes in sending artistic pieces.
19. Hope D’Letters – The ever-optimistic postwoman.
20. Penny Stamps – The thrifty mail carrier who always has stamps for sale.

“Special Delivery: Spoonerized Postal Puns”

1. Failman – Palm Fan
2. Mail Sort – Sail Mort
3. Postman – Most Pan
4. Delivery Truck – Trivery Duck
5. Letter Carrier – Cetter Lurrier
6. Packages Delivered – Dackages Pelivered
7. Mail Route – Rail Moot
8. Stamped Envelope – Stenveloped Amp
9. Express Service – Sir Press Ervice
10. Sorting Office – Orting Soffis
11. Parcel Post – Parson Poolst
12. Mailbag – Bail Mag
13. Zip Code – Chip Zode
14. Junk Mail – Munk Jail
15. Return to Sender – Seturn to Render
16. Certified Mail – Muertified Sail
17. Air Mail – Mare Ale
18. Address Label – Ladress Abel
19. Postal Worker – Wostal Porker
20. Envelope Seal – Senvelope Eal

“Special Delivery Quips: Tom Swifties With Postal Flair”

1. “I’ll deliver the mail on time,” said the mailman, promptly.
2. “I hate getting junk mail,” Tom declared, trashily.
3. “I’ve got to sort the mail,” said Tom, correspondingly.
4. “This package is urgent,” Tom noted, expressly.
5. “I’ll keep the dog at bay,” Tom barked, postally.
6. “I deliver in rain or shine,” boasted Tom, weatheringly.
7. “I stamped all the letters,” said Tom, impressively.
8. “This is first class,” Tom remarked, airmailly.
9. “I always go the extra mile,” said Tom, distantly.
10. “I’m retiring from the postal service,” Tom delivered, finally.
11. “I’ve lost the postbox key,” said Tom, unlockily.
12. “I’ve got mail for the Smiths,” said Tom, comfortably.
13. “I sort mail at lightning speed,” Tom bragged, swiftly.
14. “My mailbag is full,” said Tom, weightily.
15. “I know all the street names by heart,” said Tom, directly.
16. “I’ll need to buy more stamps,” said Tom, stickily.
17. “This letter is misaddressed,” said Tom, wrongly.
18. “I’ll cancel the wrong stamp,” Tom declared, unmistakably.
19. “I’ve been bitten by a dog,” cried Tom, painedly.
20. “These packages are heavy,” Tom groaned, burdensomely.

“Delivery Drollery: Oxymoronic Mailman Puns to Stamp Out Boredom”

1. Express Snail — the slowest speedy delivery.
2. Junk Treasure — priceless spam mail, anyone?
3. Rush to Wait — the mailman’s daily sprint to the post office standstill.
4. Postal Zen — peacefully dealing with the chaos of letters.
5. Stationary Movement — when the mail just won’t budge.
6. Silent Shout — the unread bills screaming for attention.
7. Clearly Confused — when the address is legible but makes no sense.
8. Secure Leak — when the “sealed” envelope opens up all too easily.
9. Heavy Lightweight — the big box that’s surprisingly light.
10. Seriously Funny — chuckling at the misdelivered joke book.
11. Accurate Error — when the wrong mail somehow ends up at the right place.
12. Organized Mess — sorting through the pile of mixed-up letters.
13. Living History — the mailman delivering antique postcards.
14. Clearly Obfuscated — the transparent package that’s totally inscrutable.
15. Frozen Fire — delivering hot sauce through a blizzard.
16. Modern Antique — the vintage stamps on today’s mail.
17. Quietly Loud — the mail truck’s muffler that announces its arrival.
18. Active Retirement — the old mailbag that’s still on duty.
19. Known Mystery — the regular package with unexpected contents.
20. Static Flow — the mail conveyor that’s stuck again.

Special Delivery: Unboxing Layered Mailman Puns

1. Why did the mailman become an actor? Because his entire career was in delivering lines.
2. Building upon the first, why did he stop acting? Because he couldn’t address his fear of stage fright.
3. Continuing, why did he return to delivering mail? He realized he couldn’t envelope himself in any other role.
4. Then why did he win an award? Because his performance was first class.
5. And how did he celebrate? He went stamping at the club.
6. What’s his life motto? Keep calm and courier on.
7. Why doesn’t he ever lose a race? Because he always delivers.
8. And what’s his favorite kind of humor? Priority puns.
9. How does he write love letters? With lots of express-tion.
10. Why don’t his friends play cards with him? Because he always has a delivery up his sleeve.
11. What does he call a job well done? Signed, sealed, delivered.
12. Why was the mailman stressed? Because he had too much junk in his mail-trunk.
13. How does he meditate? By staying post-ive.
14. Why won’t he ever become a librarian? Because he believes silence is postage-ous.
15. How does he cut his hair? In snail mail-style.
16. What did he say when he misdelivered a package? Oops, return to sender!
17. Why is he a great comedian? Because he always addresses the elephant in the room.
18. What would you call his autobiography? “The Life and Times of Parcel Rolle.”
19. What’s his favorite game? Hide and go seek – he always has a package to hide.
20. Why did he decide to work out? Because he wanted to bulk up his parcel-ticeps.

Special Delivery: Unpacking Puns on Mailman Clichés

1. I wanted to be a mailman, but I couldn’t deliver the punchline.
2. Being a mail carrier is a parcel of laughs—package deal, really.
3. Mailmen don’t get parking tickets, they just post bail.
4. A mailman’s favorite band? The Zip Codes.
5. I told a joke about a mailbox. The crowd was letterally roaring with laughter.
6. Sign on the mailman’s door: “Knock, Knock. Who’s there? Parcel post.”
7. You’ve got mail… others have dad jokes, but mailmen have dad puns.
8. The tired mailman said he just couldn’t express himself anymore.
9. Some relationships are like old mail routes, they just don’t deliver.
10. Mail carriers are stamp comedians; they always have a delivery line.
11. A mailman’s favorite food? Envelopperoni pizza.
12. I asked the mailman if he liked his job. He said, “Envelope so much.”
13. The mailman quit his job because he lost his ZIP.
14. That mailman is so punny, he always addresses the elephant in the room.
15. My mailman’s a heavyweight in pun boxing—he delivers a swift postage punch.
16. Mailmen have a first-class sense of humor. It’s all about the delivery.
17. The mailman started a band called “The Junk Mail.” Their hit single? “Return to Sender.”
18. Why did the mailman become a comedian? Because he had a special delivery for every joke.
19. The ghostly mailman’s favorite kind of mail? Spooktacular parcels.
20. Every letter carrier is a philosopher; they always think outside the PO box.

And that’s the special delivery of chuckles we promised—over 200 LOL-worthy mailman puns that will have you stamping your feet with laughter! We hope these pun-tastic jokes have added a touch of humor to your day and put a stamp of approval on your face. Don’t forget to wander through our punny postal route for more rib-tickling collections on our website. We’d love to mail you more fun!

Thank you for letting us post these puns into your laughter mailbox. Your time and giggles mean the world to us. Keep on laughing and sharing the joy, because who doesn’t love a delivery of daily smiles? Until next time, keep those puns parcelled and ready to send out—we can’t wait to bring you more laughs that truly hit the ‘mailbox’!

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Written By

Punsteria Team

We're the wordplay enthusiasts behind the puns you love. As lovers of all things punny, we've combined our passion for humor and wordplay to bring you Punsteria. Our team is dedicated to collecting and curating puns that will leave you laughing, groaning, and eager for more.